The Blog

“I wake up and think how fat or thin I am”

Elaine 30, in a long term relationship. She’s an opera singer from Lancashire. Teaches music in London.

How are you?

I don’t know! (I love this answer, very honest) 

Where does all your energy go?

A lot of my energy goes into worrying what other people think about me. I take things very personally - I worry a lot.

What brings you down?

When I was 13, me and this other girl got the lead roles in a play. The other girl was very thin so I starved myself. Everyday I wake up and think about how fat or thin I am.

What do you like about yourself?

I like that I’m on a journey - for a long time it’s been a burden and now I realise you never get there  - I’m enjoying that. I like that I’ve done a lot of work on myself. I’m proud of myself and I’ve got a great singing voice too!

What would you like to leave for the next generation?

The ability to be content and to be ok, I’m just not!

What have you taken on board from today?

That it’s nice to stop and talk like this. It helps clarify things  - you don’t often just stop and think. I’m always analyzing, judging and being too harsh on myself.